There are many times when I go onto my website visitor stat page, and look at the pages you guys are viewing. I can do that. Anyway, I’m often quite entertained. You guys tend to dig up the oldest, funniest, stuff on the site. And it cracks me up. Because I have to say, I am probably one of my favorite writers. I don’t want to sound cocky or anything, but I really like to read what I have to say. So I’m looking around, and I find this. But I would be remiss for giving myself all the credit on this one, not when teams like the Padres and Dodgers provide me with material like this. Here’s a short excerpt.
Bottom of the 9th, the Padres are down 5-0… heading into the 10th, with the score tied 5-5… The Padres win!… for the first time since last Sunday! [7 days prior]
I’ll let you guys read the rest. But lets just say, this was one of the saddest games ever.
"I don’t like the Padres or the Dodgers, but I can’t pass this up" – April 30th, 2006
Hey guys. Sorry about the long absence. I came down with some strangeillness and I had to take a trip to the ER. Apparently I was the 10th
such student from my school, (of 2,000) to go to that ER in the last
day and a half. But I’m on the upswing now. It couldn’t have happened
at a worse time though – I missed two exams and a paper. So now I’m
playing catch up with work. Anyway, BHGM celebrated birthday #2 on Sunday the 29th, and as promised, we’ve got more Birthday Bash Flashbacks. Another two-fer today. The theme is, really bad things can be really funny.
First we’re going with the classic "Kazmir, Cubs, Duffy, and College Baseball Lying" post from May 19th, 2006. Had a lot of bad stuff happening then. Scott Kazmir can’t put the ball in its place, a drunkard chucks a ball at the terrible Jacque Jones while he tries to play the outfield, Barry Bonds gets an intentional walk of the most untraditional sort, and the Pirate’s Chris Duffy commences another Operation Shutdown. Bronson Arroyo forgets that pitchers bat in the NL, and says, after his embarrassing lose to the Pirates, that ‘there is something wrong with me if I can’t feel comfortable against that lineup… they’re one of the weakest teams in baseball.’ Next, we have a video of a college baseball (PING!) player fake a hit by pitch on a pitch that clearly came nowhere close to him, which is hilarious. Finally, the Angels start playing like a group of scrubs. Classic stuff, really is.
And then we’ve got the original "I guess Operation Shutdown also involves Cocaine," April 22nd, 2006. Many of you may recall when Pirate Derek Bell claimed that, unless the Pirates gave him a spot on the roster which he clearly, (previous season’s avg: .173), didn’t deserve, he wouldn’t engage in "competition" for a spot. This was a short post so I recommend checking it out. But because I can’t resist, here’s what went down after:
Bell went AWOL from the Pirate Ship and was released two days later. Operation
Shutdown was in its 49th month when Bell was pulled over and the cops
found a "warm crack pipe" in the car. Looks like Operation Shutdown just became Operation Go to Jail. As the SuperFreak himself once said, "Cocaine…is a **** of a drug." And I’ll never miss a chance to work that in.
So there you have it. The best screw ups just make for the best humor.
Kazmir, Cubs, Duffy, and College Baseball Lying – May 19th, 2006
I guess Operation Shutdown also involves Cocaine – April 22nd, 2006
Take a look; you’ll never see a worse team than the Royals – May 25th, 2006
Yankees SP, Friday in Review – May 27th, 2006
BHGM’s second birthday bash is Sunday, April 29th! That will still, technically, be the weekend, so let’s all get drunk and celebrate! This is a perfect opportunity for me to bring up a lot of fun posts from the last couple years. I’m going to skip the obvious ones, such as Manny’s greatest play of all time, which has evolved into it’s own separate entity on the web, (Google: "greatest play of all time.") Anyway, for the next week or so I am going to throw out some surprises like this, in addition to our regular postings. You lucky readers!
Here’s two posts I wrote last year that are perfect for now. The first one is entitled, "Take a look; you’ll never see a worse team than the Royals." I wrote a lot about the Royals last year, but this is probably my favorite short quip at them.
Next is "Yankees SP, Friday in Review," where we looked at potential starters that the Yankees should acquire. This is especially interesting given where these guys actually ended up, who we did get before the trade deadline last year, and the current situation of our pitching. For added fun, I’ve added some Wonder Years style updates to the post that really hammer those points home. You can pretty much skip the rest of the post, and just read the bold, I was kind of long-winded last year. Anyway, the best part of this post is the video at the end. I’m just going to go ahead and repost that part right here, as you’re all apt to not actually click on any link I post.
Kids these days. They really like to set up basketball rims by
their trampolines and dunk like Michael. Here’s the thing –
jumping too high can sometimes be a bad thing. Things can happen when
you jump over the rim that shouldn’t happen. By the way, when we’re injured, can we not lay motionless and
moan? What happened to walking it off? It would also be nice if this
kid’s friends hadn’t run away and abandoned him to the elements. However, the cameraman laughing at him is perfectly acceptable